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MaWhero will be going in to do his tests and first counselling session in two days…if all goes according to plan.

Please, please, please let it go according to plan. And then please, please, please let the outcomes be positive.

This time round it is just excruciating trying to trust that even this first step will go ahead.

I hate that this journey has taken away our innocence in so many ways.

The plan is that he will go in on Wednesday morning and do the donation first then have a one hour counselling session with the clinic counsellor. We should get the S*erm Analysis results back that day or the next.

If that, (and the counselling session), all go okay then we’ll book in the blood tests & transfer $800 dollars into his account to pay for them. He’s non-resident in NZ so blood tests are not subsidised at all.

If they come back okay then we start the donations and the obligatory 3mth quarantine period.

Ironically it is possible that we’ll be trying in mid-August which is when we conceived the first time, with a baby potentially due in mid-May which is not only another whole year away – (sigh), but will be exactly three years after our first child was due.

I emailed MaWhero last week with some advice from the clinic around minimum & maximum abstinence periods before making this initial donation. He hadn’t replied so I txtd today to check he’d read it. He came back with a succinct ‘Got it.’ Even that makes me nervous – he said not to be shy about saying what we needed him to do, but every time I need to text him I worry I being a pain and that he’ll decide it’s too much hassle and change his mind.

I’m on total tenterhooks and just hoping so very much that this all works out.

Meanwhile my darling wife has shared with me that she very, very, very much wants a child now – for herself, rather than just wanting it for me.

Please let this happen for us universe.

Nau Mai, Haere Mai toku pepi.

It’s our turn. It’s.Our.Turn. It’s our Mutha Flippin’ Turn!