I love the first week of the TWW. It’s especially welcome now after around 16mths of not being able to try.
Following is my LONG version of yesterday. The short version is – I had a great day, the IUI went swimmingly (hehe), we are hopeful and happy.
Yesterday went so very well. I felt like I coasted through the day on a cloud of happiness and readiness.
I’m so glad that we didn’t do the IUI on CD15 (Monday) as for some reason I was just so hyped up and agitated, well it just would not have been great. From the freaking awful blood test onwards the day was stressful. Waiting from 9am till the clinic rang at 1pm was unbearable – and then to hear that they felt I wasn’t ready was so disappointing. I had worries that they were misjudging it, and that surely my instincts that Monday was the day should count for something.
Darling Toku was very patient and have me a zillion calm hugs and reminders to breathe & rub the (calming) acupuncture point that the acupuncturist had left in my ear (like a tiny ball bearing taped onto the top of my ear). We got through the day and had a lovely dinner with our friends, then I meditated to sleep. (One of about 6 meditations I did over the weekend!)
I woke happy and relaxed on Tuesday, somehow not even getting too worked up about my blood test. Thank goodness for my needle phobia hypnotherapy as I don’t know how I would’ve coped before!
The blood test went well and we went home and had a delicious breakfast in the sun. Then we had arranged to meet a friend Aroha who is a traditional Maori healer and specializes in ‘haputanga’ (everything to do with fertility, pregnancy& birth).
As soon as we arrived she said I was ready and spoke as though I was hapu already. She got me up on the massage table and did a kind of a massage of my stomach and back, plus other healing which I guess is easiest described as kind of like a Maori form of reiki. She made lots of happy affirming noises and pronounced me “so ready”. This was brilliant as she was the person who told me I needed to take a break last time Manaaki was here, as I was too stressed and my body wasn’t ready.
Then she decided I needed some sun on my puku (tummy) as I was a little too cold for an ideal conception environment, so we decided to head to a local park that is a traditional Maori special site and a volcano.
As we left the house I looked for my phone to take it off silent and I realised the clinic was ringing. The nurse advised my LH had surged and I was booked for the IUI at 3.30pm – yippee! Hugs all round.
Then it was off to find just the right spot at the park. We three lay in the lee of a old lava stone wall, soaking up some strong NZ sunshine. We discussed her husband and other choice topics, told rude jokes, giggled and laughed uproariously and ate cheese and bagels and fruit and had a delicious time. She is so infectious, and had me smiling hard when she randomly called out to strangers “We’re going to have a baybee!” Then would chortle with glee.
However, a disclaimer, although I have experienced her psychic abilities in a phenomenal way before (another post perhaps), I know it’s not a 100% given that she’s got the timing of this one right, she may just be getting the vibe that my body is ready and that it will it happen soon…so I won’t think less of her if it’s not this month.
That said, Jiminey Crickets this time felt right!
After our 3 hour interlude of laughter with Aroha we dropped her home, went to a cafe for Toku to grab something extra to eat. I wasn’t quite up to eating, so I guess the nerves were kicking in a little then and I had a bit of a tight stomach. So in order to regain my happy place I insisted we get to the clinic early. We sat outside in the car with 15mins to spare and I did a 15min bodily relaxation meditation.
To my surprise I managed a really deep relaxation – I thought in full sunshine on a noisy main road, 15 minutes out from our much awaited IUI that I would not get much effect. However Toku reported watching with interest as I slumped further and further down into the car seat.
I left the car floating on air and dozy as!
Toku was laughing at my dreaminess. We sat in reception to have the nurses come out & say they were off downstairs to pick up the s*perm. Then they traipsed back up and said it wasn’t ready. In all we waited 20mins sitting there. I cracked up laughing when Toku said – “Oh OF COURSE we are waiting now!” It’s been the theme of this whole journey! If there is a possibility of needing to wait – then we wait. All I could do was laugh, and it didn’t stress me at all. I just texted the acupuncturist and said we’d be 20mins late for her. (The clinic had advised we’d only be 20mins from arrival to departure so we had booked acupuncture 45mins later.)
They finally got the sample and called us in. My hand was shaking as I signed the forms, so I guess I was nervous but I really wasn’t feeling it in my head.
The procedure was about as embarrassing as any with your feet in stirrups. The nurse positioning the speculum (light-up-glow-in-the-dark speculum!) was not your most gentle of positioners. I ended up telling her off. It wasn’t the internal part but her hand on the outside that maybe she want paying much attention to! I’d expected to find the catheter no issue after having the lipoidol flush, but it was actually quite a bit sorer than I expected. Then the other nurse stepped in to make sure it was positioned properly. I thought she was just getting it in place and I was squeezing Toku’s hand and breathing deeply to get through the discomfort when they announced that they were all done. So I missed the ‘actual moment’. I was kind of disappointed with that, I would have preferred to have known when they were going to press the plunger so I could be thinking good receptive thoughts, not just gritting my teeth. Or I may have asked if Toku could do the honours. But I wasn’t too bummed as I was feeling so happy about it all.
Then the nurses left us there to relax. Toku texted the acupuncturist and I lay on the table doing yet another relaxation exercise.
Our counsellor popped by to give us her best wishes and we had a brief chat with the nurses about results, monitoring etc before departing for the acupuncturist.
The acupuncture was also just perfect. She had me lie on my side all wrapped up in soft blankets with needles in my back and scalp and a heat lamp on my back. The sun was setting and streaming in on me and I felt so safe and peaceful. I fell asleep and woke just as she came back in. At that point I was so zen I could barely speak lol.
We went for dinner then Toku drove us the 1.25hr drive home to our doggy-girl and bed.
All in all, the most blissful, perfect, serene attempt to conceive yet.